Dreams...

Dreams are a strange matter. I mean those we seek to fulfill in our future. And recently I understood how important having dreams can be.

It is interesting how different people think and perceive the world differently and cope with it differently. For example I think my dad has followed a pretty clear to him path in life. And I find it must be one’s goal to learn to see at least the next few steps on his road. How my dad has held his head cool and been determined to follow his path I do not know. Maybe his interest in the exotic and his extensive yoga training help him see himself and things around him more rationally… What I am heading to is the fact that meditation is a tricky matter as everything in life. While my dad can lie down for half an hour, calm his breath, chill and rise up refreshed to come up with a plan for the rest of his day or the next week, this process can be nothing like that for another person. Or for example some persons might not have found this process for them… like me and insight can hit you on strange places.

Yesterday at some point in the discotheque I got bored and sat down at the sofa reserved for our little group as we had a birthday party. While reaching for my drink I wondered why I am not having fun… And at this point when no one is paying attention to you and you are seeking none I found out that you can see through things around you very clearly – the females seeking attention, the males hungry for sex, the couples having fun around… enough to make you loose interest in what is around but what is inside you. Then a question from a game I recently played on the PSP ringed in my mind: “What is your dream?”… And strangely I couldn’t answer that. I realized I missed the focus into which to pour my work and determination… It was easy the first year in university, I got a nice girlfriend and I just wanted to be nice to her and to pass all my exams and you know what I did it. But strangely this year was totally hectic both in realtionships and university is not so smooth… I realized it is not the girl that influenced me but the fact I didn’t have clear goals to pursuit. Hopefully now that I know the cause of bringing slack and disarray I might finally start dealing it and decide what I want to do. In the end no one did anything by lingering on his bottom and picking his nose :D.